Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Do I have Schizoid Personality Disorder or some odd variant?

Obviously, I realize I can't know for sure unless I got get diagnosed, but I'm curious. I've been home from college since December '08 (it's now april 6th) and within that time I've rarely gone out to seek any type of outside interaction. Normally if I do it's because I want something, not social cravings of any kind. I'd consider my closest friend my cat, mainly because he doesn't talk. Apart from that I've got a total of two people I'd consider friends and I rarely see them (once since I've come home) and this doesn't bother me... at all. I've even blown them off when asked to hang out or I'll make an excuse because it just doesn't really interest me to go out and see anyone. In the few times I have gone out I've just felt alienated and I'd either make an excuse to leave or just venture inward and think nostalgic thoughts or future scenarios that're too far-fetched to ever come true. I tend to watch people a lot when in a public situation, I think people are really interesting in nature, but I just find them boring to talk to. My parents think I'm extremely apathetic and lazy--I do sleep a lot, but it is sort of my sanctuary from the outside world. I guess what worries me is this all started back at college when I stopped going to cles, instead I'd stay in my apartment and read or sleep until the late afternoon. I've even lost my job due to these problems. I guess my question is is this behavior 'normal'? I'm just curious, I don't really care to rekindle any relationships or create new ones. - Cheers

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